Writing

No License For You.

No License For You.

Johnny's doing really well. A few small hiccups, but hey, he's a teen boy. Other than my house smelling like a locker room, it's been pretty smooth sailing over here. He's here as a kinship foster placement right now. We aren't related, but because I have a...

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Welcome Home, Kid.

Welcome Home, Kid.

A teenage boy is coming to live with me. Today. In eight hours, I will be an official foster parent. It's been only a few months, but I have notes upon notes about my short experience so far with this child welfare system of ours. I can't wrap my head around how we...

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I’m Supposed to Be in the Creek

I’m Supposed to Be in the Creek

Last week, I was in my favorite place in the world with my 15-person family. Every few years, we head to a ranch in the mountains of Colorado. We've been going here since I was a little girl, and there is truly no place I would rather be. I told my clients I was out,...

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“See you next year?”

“See you next year?”

I volunteered to go to an education meeting last week with a foster kid. This kid was in high school and not too interested in me at first. I didn't blame him, I'd never met him before and this was a child who lives in a constantly-changing world with...

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The Santa Exit Plan

The Santa Exit Plan

It was late-September of 2008 when we brought my son home from China, just two months before December and our sparkly, over-the-top, American-style Christmas season. My little boy had no idea what Christmas was. He had no idea who Santa was. Hell,...

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…Except That It’s Christmas

…Except That It’s Christmas

This time of year, man. It’s stressful and chaotic and my annual intention of providing a Pinterest-perfect Christmas lasts about a day and a half until I decide that F-bombs will definitely help me assemble the gingerbread house. Ahhh, December. This year, the...

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Dear Donald Trump, from an adoptive mom.

Dear Donald Trump, from an adoptive mom.

­­Dear Donald Trump, My son thinks ­­you want to deport him. I’m sorry, did I jump ahead of myself there? That was rude of me. Let’s start over. Hi there. I’m Rebecca. Yes, yes, nice to meet you, too. I have an adopted son. He was adopted from China in 2008, when he...

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I Gotcha, Kiddo.

I Gotcha, Kiddo.

Jax’s eighth Gotcha Day is coming up. “Gotcha Day” is the anniversary of Jax’s adoption from China. It’s the day Jax became our son, and like good adoptive parents, we celebrate. Jax gets a few presents, we decorate, we eat pizza and cake, we participate in general...

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The Invisible People

The Invisible People

I was at a Ross the other day. I love Ross. There is one by my son's school, and on the days I don't feel like laptopping at Starbucks, I walk around in their exceptional summer air conditioning while having riveting conversations with myself about my need for their...

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“To Girls Everywhere, I Am With You.”

“To Girls Everywhere, I Am With You.”

"To girls everywhere, I am with you." This is how a woman who was assaulted and raped behind a dumpster at Stanford University ended her statement to her attacker at his sentencing hearing. My admiration for this woman is seeping out of my pores. If this were me,...

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Flying School

Flying School

Today was Jax's first day of summer school (ESY for you special education people). He hasn't been in a school setting for about a year because some medical issues snowballed with his anxiety, which resulted in the school district sending a teacher to...

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Monopoly

Monopoly

My son, Jax, is obsessed with Monopoly Junior. He thinks it is the best game ever invented, which let’s be honest, is slightly unfortunate for those of us around him. We play it after dinner, before breakfast, on the iPad. It’s a lot of Monopoly Junior. I feel like I...

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“What if I Don’t Love Him?”

“What if I Don’t Love Him?”

A few days ago, I was looking back at the photographs I have of my son before we brought him home, photos of when he was still in China. One of his therapists wants to do a photographic timeline with him, and I was click-click-clicking through the photos on my laptop...

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Prince

Prince

It was 1984, and I was barely 11. We lived outside of Chicago and were headed to the home of family friends for dinner. Unlike my family, these friends lived large. They had lots of disposable income and were unapologetically flashy. They competed in horse jumping,...

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My Love is Louder

My Love is Louder

My son, Jax, spent last Friday night at his dad's house. On Saturday morning, I waited for my ex-husband's big, white, cowboy of a truck, and opened my front door to greet my son as the truck pulled into my driveway. It was February 13th, the day before...

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To the Moms I Am Not, But Was Supposed to Be

To the Moms I Am Not, But Was Supposed to Be

My son is a quirky kid. He talks about airplanes 99% of the time, he doesn't like video games, and his natural energy level makes hiding the sugar products on the top shelf of the pantry a necessity. He has cleft scars that make his lip a little puffy, his...

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I Didn’t Take A Picture

I Didn’t Take A Picture

This past Friday, my son, Jax, and I went to the park. It was early, around 9am, and we were the only ones there. It was quiet and calm, a complete contrast to our typical park visits. Jax was free to run up and down the play structure that, in his head, was...

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The Over-Sharing Soundtrack

The Over-Sharing Soundtrack

There is an ongoing debate in the online special needs community about over-sharing. Are we mom and dad bloggers stepping over the line when we share stories and details about our kids and their special needs? It’s a heated debate, a thing, a downright brouhaha. I...

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